My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
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