yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize