Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I lost the right to judge tonight
Randomize
