I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
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