so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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