Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
