and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
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