You're completely useless in the revolution.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
