so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
