Jerry, you need to find god
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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