Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
