the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
