i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
