I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
