I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
