Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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