gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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