so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
