you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
