He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
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