I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
