I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
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