Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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