singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
