We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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