your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Randomize