He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize