Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
