therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
my sisters under your porch take her home
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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