so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
