You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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