dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
