You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize
