Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Randomize
