do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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