Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Please don't give away my fajitas
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize