Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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