He disabled his match.com account in front of me
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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