I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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