but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize
