I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize