And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
