I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
