So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize