I want to stick my p in your. b.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Randomize