I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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