She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
