Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
