She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
