Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
