what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
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